Friday, December 5, 2008

Pet Peeves: the offical list

1. “That’s what she said jokes”
2. the Cohen Brothers
3. Chewing with your mouth open.
4. Men who want ‘blankets’ but lead you on, they’d have you think they’re genuine.
5. Girls who are okay with being ‘blankets’ and ruin it for the rest of us
6. Brown-nosers who charade themselves in front of teachers
7. Insincerity.
8. Heavy Metal.
9. African Americans who think the world is out to get them.
10. Racists who aren’t white.
11. People who talk shit about you but smile and pretend to be your best friend in front of you.
12. The new facebook.
13. People who pick on Obama just to prove they don’t support mainstream society.
14. Posers.
15. Girls who ignore you while in the company of males.
16. Scene kids.
17. Bitchy girls that you haven’t seen for over 4 years but still shit talk you.
18. People who work in porn and advertise it in front of your mom.
19. Sob stories that end in me losing a great deal of time/money or both.
20. Fox News, and those who defend it.
21. One-sided love.
22. Obnoxious, too cool for school, people under 18.
23. Friends who insist you entertain them all the time.
24. Caramel
25. Watching, or being exposed to incest.
26. Hidden onions.
27. Mushrooms, the non-trippy ones.
28. Men that don’t want relationships and lie about it.
29. Long drives (30 minutes +)
30. Touching old guy’s faces, their dry skin… its creepy.
31. Any movie I edit after about 3 hours of work.
32. Spiders and creepy crawlies.
33. Hiding things from my Mom, or the police.
34. Cute guys with girlfriends.
35. Loosing weight.
36. South Park
37. Jealousy.
38. Pretentious-ass art kids.
39. Waiting for your check to come at a restaurant.
40. The Police.
41. People who can’t differentiate comfortable and uncomfortable silences.
42. Angry pets.
43. Farting/ Queef noises, in any context.
44. Rude people who refuse to believe they are rude.
45. Irresponsibility.
46. Picky eaters.
47. Those who take love for granted.
48. Roaches.
49. Grits that are too soupy.
50. The stink of hedgehogs and their nasty ass poop.


carolinolicious said...

Haha I love this list! You must have been in a bad mood that day :)

But what's a 'blanket'? Some Floridian term?

malicewhit said...

a blanket is a person that you're in a "relationship" with that you aren't serious about. its someone who is there just to hold you and provide shallow emotional comfort... sexual comfort too.