Sunday, February 22, 2009

Reasons why I am the perfect woman for a 35 year old professional

1. Guys are scared of growing old, dating someone hot and younger makes them feel better about themselves. Being both younger and “hot” to the right people (those who like more than boobs on a stick) I fulfill those fantasies.
2. I too have strong career goals.
3. I am in my 20’s (just entered, yay) so therefore I am a ball of spontaneity and playfulness. This keeps guys enthused and is a necessary part of any relationship.
4. I am ready to try something serious.
5. Though my hands have been bitten many times (and continues to be bitten). I am still willing to hold my heart out with both hands.
6. Older guys do not always have the energy that young men do. They like to be challenged but they also like to lay back. I am not terribly athletic and enjoy my days in bed sometimes. Therefore I am a great homebody companion for lazy days. Conversely, I can never have enough sex. Who can hate that?
7. I tolerate shit for the sake of generosity and giving people a fair try.
8. I like shared showers.
9. Guys with goals turn me on, but success isn’t something that drives my emotions.
10. Getting dressed up is fun to me.
11. I’ll go to any party: wine party, kegger, or family luau… I mean really who cares. It’s a true test of two people’s relationship to see if they can really have fun wherever they go. That’s how I know my best friend Shaayna and I are made for each other.
12. I hate people who complain about getting up before noon.
13. My loyalty is not dependant on what time you come home.

In conclusion, I am tired of fucking dealing with shallow ass Tallahassee people. It doesn’t even really matter whether I want to date them, fuck them or just plain and simply to be their friend. There is something about his town that turns people into flakes. People will take your feelings and stomp on you as if you were a cigarette butt. I feel like every friendship/relationship I have up here is on a timer. Everyone just smiles and laughs as the timer ticks by. At the first sign of distaste they abandon you, and show no desire to patch things up.
I hate it.
Sometimes I think its on par with the disvalue of human life. I mean, if we don’t look at each encounter as a gift from God, who knows how we might think back on the present. Who knows what pain our rash actions today may cost us later? I wish people here could just grow the fuck up. Or I wish I could get the fuck out. Really, I just want to join a scene where people don’t take others for granted.

2 comments:

Vanny said...

My last 3 relationships where with professionals in the 30-48 age range. They're just as bad as the younger ones, they've just had more time to perfect the art of being douche bags. Still, I wouldn't date anyone under 28. Not because older men are more mature (at all!), but they do have a more mature taste and that I can enjoy.

carolinolicious said...

Sounds like it's time to move....

And I've always dated older guys. Not a whole bunch over thirty, but I wouldn't mind next time I'm in a relationship bein pampered n petted by someone born before 1975. Just one thing- guys that age are not really lookin to make a wifey out of a twenty year old. If you ARE gonna sex up some hot mature professional, know that no matter how nice of a guy he is, that's all it will be. Sex.

Other then that, have fun!

Oh, and get the hell out of Tallahassee. (You Really should check out that CD on my list of the same name. So sad, so sad)